In a relationships, we can often come across situations where we feel we are not respected enough. Being taken for granted and situations where we do not feel valued can slowly make us wanting to leave the relationship as well. However, worst are the situations when we are insulted. Insults are intentional, hurtful and done with the idea of harming the emotional health of a person. Often, our past traumas and our experiences are weaponised in order to shape them into insult and make it more hurtful. In such situations, it is important to know how to respond.
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Speaking of such situations, Therapist Sara Kuburic wrote, “At some point, we’ve all experienced feeling insulted or hurt. It’s easy to get triggered and become reactive, or hurt and bottle it up. Articulating how we feel and setting a boundary is often a healthier alternative.” Take a look at the alternative responses suggested by the therapist:
Asking to stop: We can be direct of the way we are hurt by the insult. We can directly ask the person to stop hurting us with the insults thrown at us.
Respect: Asking to be treated with respect in an important boundary that we must set for ourselves. We can respond to an insult with disagreement and still ask to be respected.
Walking away: When things get out of hand and you may feel like having an emotional trigger, it is best to walk away from the situation in order to regulate the nervous system.
Explanation: Asking for an explanation can help us in getting more clarity about the argument or the conversation.
Setting boundaries: Sometimes jokes can be moulded into an insult. In such cases, we should set the boundary of jokes and let the other person know that it is hurtful.
Ending the conversation: We can set an ultimatum and give a second chance to the person – we can also warn them of ending the conversation if boundaries are not respected.
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