The perpetual question singles are often plagued with: Why do you stay single is infuriating? Singlehood to non-singles may feel like an unwilling compulsion which draws the patronising urge to uncover the reason. Singlehood is treated as a problem that needs to be solved. @Ok-Fondant2536 on the subreddit Ask Reddit, asked why people stayed singles and the responses were intriguing and broadened the horizon on what it means to be single.
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Single and happy
Some Redditors reflected on their traumatic past relationships. Redditor @lowteq said,” After being cheated on in every relationship I have had, it’s hard to justify the rat race. I am tired, Boss.” While, @asgoodascopper said, “Sometimes it’s better to be lonely than unhappy 😔”
Singlehood is a much-needed break from an overwhelming relationship. Sometimes being single is all about protecting mental peace and time to heal past wounds. Many even said relationships are complicated to navigate, so as much as it’s a reprieve from the emotional toll, it’s also to stay carefree and happy. Redditor @alwayschocolates said, “It’s so easy and simple. Relationships are hard and complicated.”
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Still looking out for the right person
Singlehood is also a period of holding back and looking for the right person. As @Chemical_Ad3941 said, “I’d rather be on my own than live a lifetime with the wrong person. It doesn’t mean I’ve lost hope though, the good one’s out there somewhere, waiting for me, too. But I complete me anyways, so I’m still happy as is.”
Often the fear of being single drives people to the wrong arms. Singlehood gives time for introspection as well as for what kind of life partner one is looking forward to. It’s the confident refusal to not settle for anything less. All hope is not lost, with a glass-half-full view, singlehood may even lead to better prospects.
Prioritising yourself
Singlehood is also a period of growth and self-focus, a time to build a strong foundation for the future. Redditor @NeeDuhHelPuh shared, “I want to be stable financially and emotionally before being with someone. Why? I don’t like holding people back or burdening them. Once I feel stable enough, I feel like I would be ready.” It’s about prioritising the future and highlighting the need to be financially stable to provide in the relationship equally. Singlehood is the best time not to get distracted and focus on goals.
Self-doubt
Sometimes, people may choose to stay away from dating because they believe they are unlovable. Redditor @/PandawiseDancingBear’s gut-wrenching comment, “No one wants me lmao,” shows a painful and vulnerable belief that many singles might have at some point.
Redditor @shadestyle agreed “Felt big time. Just had a date unmatched and block me the day after making any plans. Not the 1st time it’s happened either.” This belief mostly originates from previous relationships gone south. It’s a form of self-sabotage as well, where a person unconsciously prevents themselves from pursuing meaningful connections or putting themselves out there. By convincing themselves they are unworthy of love, they create a barrier.
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