A relationship is built of trust, loyalty and mutual fond emotions for each other. After the initial phase of falling in love, a relationship becomes a long journey of two people engaging in healthy communications and understanding each other to make a safe space for them to grow individually and together. However, not all relationships are meant to last forever. Some relationships are extremely unhealthy and built on manipulation and mental trauma. In such cases, people may have a tough time letting go of the relationship. But why does it happen? Addressing this, Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders wrote, “There is a lot of internal preparation that we do as we gear for a big change like a break up, and often there are always a combination of factors at play.”
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Emily further noted down possible reasons as to why we struggle to leave unhealthy relationships:
Change: In unhealthy relationship, we often stay back hoping to see positive change in our partner.
Strategies: We also try out different strategies to see which one works and makes our relationship last longer.
Children: Having children together can be a huge reason for staying back in an unhealthy relationship thinking that we must not let the children grow up without two parents together.
Expectations: We often lower our own expectations from the relationship and try to be happy with what we have.
Time and energy: After having spent considerable time together, we choose to stay back in an unhealthy relationship thinking that we cannot let the time and energy already invested, go to waste.
Confusion: In unhealthy relationships, sometimes there are happy times too, and that can get us confused on whether to move on or stay back.
Grief: The thought of breaking up can feel us with the kind of grief that we are not ready to face. Hence, we choose to stay back.
Problems: Sometimes we are manipulated to think that we are the problem, and hence we spend time in figuring out and making things better from our end.
