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Habits to break to have a successful relationship

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Successful relationships are built on respect, trust and clear communication of needs, wants, expectations and boundaries. Successful, safe and intimate relationships take a lot of efforts from both ends, and ultimately, become the safe space for exchange of emotions. As we grow older, we understand the trauma and the effects of the same that we are carrying. This can further affect the adult relationships that we make in the later stages of life. This creates a lot of habits in us, which can impact the relationship negatively. Addressing the same, Therapist Elizabeth Earnshaw wrote, “There are a lot of habits that can disrupt the happiness in our relationships – you can probably easily name a few. You likely know you shouldn’t criticise when you’re trying to get your point across, that it’s better to issue a boundary than an ultimatum, and that continuing to hash something out when the argument is going nowhere isn’t helpful.”

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Elizabeth further noted down a few habits that can be toxic for relationships, and hence, should be avoided. They are, as follows:

Shared responsibilities: Shared responsibilities are meant to be respected and should be divided equally between the two partners. In the beginning of a relationship, one person always tends to take over the majority of shared responsibilities. But with time, this can get very tiring, further leading to resentment and fights.

Overscheduling: In relationships, we often do not put enough time for doing things together. Overscheduling things of interest and hobbies, without taking out time for each other can also affect the relationship adversely.

Personal stress: Internal stress and the coping mechanism of two people can cause further stress in the relationship, making it a healthy one.

Boundaries of technology: The overuse of technology and the exploitation of the same, and not paying attention to the relationship around, can cause a lot of distance. With the advent of work from home culture, the lines between work and home have got blurred, which has led to more distance between the people in relationships.

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