End of a relationship can trigger a range of emotions, mostly painful ones. At initial stages, one is yet to process the heart-breaking event completely and before the acceptance stage, one may consider actions or decision that may not be practical or turn out to be right. Often the one who has been dumped takes longer time to navigate life after breakup and may repeatedly feel that they must have done or said something wrong which led to the separation. This is the reason many people try to call or text their ex to convince them that ‘they will change’ and beg to rekindle the relationship. (Also read: Breakup Day 2023: 8 effective tips to deal with post-breakup depression)
Is it a good idea to beg or request your ex to get back? An expert says one should put themselves first and resist the temptation.
A breakup happens for a reason and that reason may not be you. Sometimes two people are just not compatible, or people may change over a course of time. The other person may have different expectations from their life or have different priorities. It is not a single event that leads to a breakup.
So, it is likely that if you beg and ask your partner to come back to your life, things may not end well. Even if you rekindle a relationship with them, things may not stretch beyond a point.
“So, you want to text your ex or ring your ex and you want to tell them that you’ve changed. Ladies, no. This is for men too, but ladies specifically speaking to you here. Why? Why do you want to tell them that you have changed. If that man does not want to be in the relationship, why are you still choosing him. Why are you still choosing that relationship? That is a reflection on you. This isn’t a criticism or judgment but if there’s an insecurity there. If there’s a pain point for you there that you are wrapping up your identity and this relationship with this man. You are changing according to the things that he wants in order to get him back. Who are you really doing that for? Who are you really showing up for? Are you showing up for yourself? Are you showing up for that little girl inside? Are you really honouring your needs in a relationship?” wrote Relationship Coach Stefanos in his recent Instagram post.
Put yourself first and make a fresh start if you want to be fair to yourself.