Boundaries are extremely important in any relationship. Knowing our needs, wants and expectations helps us to have clarity in the relationship and also surrounds ourselves with people who are healthy for us. “Developing a healthy relationship with yourself involves recognising and respecting your needs, setting realistic expectations, and establishing a balance between personal and external demands,” wrote Therapist Israa Nasir. “Having good boundaries with yourself is like giving yourself some space and respect. It’s all about looking out for your mental and emotional health, keeping a balance in relationships, and avoiding that burnout feeling,” she added.
Not having healthy boundaries with ourselves can cost us our emotional and mental health.
Overcommitment to others: Committing to others more than we can tackle and not agreeing to being onboard with their ideas, but still doing it because of our people-pleasing nature can be difficult for our own health.
Attitude of self-neglect: We also neglect our own needs and expectations and push ourselves as a priority far down and try to prioritise others. This attitude of self-neglect can make us feel deprived of our own needs. This can cause frustration.
Ignoring our emotions: When we feel overwhelmed with difficult emotions, we often try to avoid addressing them and distract us with something else instead. This can make hard emotions pile up and cause the outpour of those emotions in an unhealthy way.
Self-critical thoughts: Being our own harsh critic and talking to ourselves in an unhealthy and negative manner can have a deep impact on our sense of self-confidence and self-trust.
Difficulty saying no: Saying no when we disagree with something is very important. When we do not do that and instead keep saying yes to ideas we do not agree with, we are filled with frustration and resentment.
