A relationship is a safe space for two people to share their vulnerabilities, love, all kinds of emotions, and grow individually and also together. A safe relationship ensures the sense of belonging somewhere and creates more positivity and the strive for growth in people. A relationship requires understanding from both sides to make it long-lasting and healthy. A relationship also goes through ups and downs, and it is okay to have conflicts in a relationship. However, we should ensure that the relationship must not turn toxic for the people involved. To be emotionally safe, it is important to be with someone who loves us, understands us and also gives importance to communication in the relationship.
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Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders addressed the need of emotionally safe relationships, and wrote, “If you were raised in an emotionally unsafe environment, a lack of safety may feel familiar, and red flags may not flash as red. Behavior that shouldn’t be normalized may feel normal. You should not have to hide parts of yourself, work overtime to appease, feel like you’re walking on eggshells, or be confused as to where you stand with the person. It’s important to know what markers of a safe relationship are. Here is an idea of what emotional safety looks like in your relationships (romantic, familial, or platonic).”
Sensitive things: The things that we share with our partner in a relationship should not be used against us at any cost. Instead, they should be supportive of our vulnerabilities and our deepest emotions.
Boundaries: Each person has their own set of boundaries, and even the partner must not overstep them at any point of time.
Vulnerability: The other person should also be vulnerable to us – this will create stronger bonds and will bring two people closer.
Clarity: There should be a clear idea of where the relationship stands and what the future prospects of it are. No one should be left wondering.
Hiding: Hiding our emotions and downplaying our own successes are indicators of a toxic relationship.
Expectations: The partner’s behaviour should be consistent – this will help us to have expectations from them.
Tough conversations: A healthy relationship involves having difficult conversations without unhealthy ways of stopping it or one person trying to win.
Walking on eggshells: Being careful of the other person and being scared of them indicates an unhealthy and unsafe relationship.
Appreciation: A little appreciation goes a long way, and everyone should be valued in the relationship.
